Luciano is killing time.


Luciano as he looks today, off duty. He looks quiet and
just your every day teddy bear. Even perhaps friendly.
But our Luciano is of the Dark Side.

Consider these pictures of well known deaths from history and antiquity.






Spencer Percival.


what have they all got in common.

Yes thats right. A clock.

In every photograph but never to this day remarked upon.

Until now.

Luciano is near immortal, cannot be killed except by
another family member, and they are in the main docile, nice but dim,
teddy bears. All down history he has been ticking along.

He is even rumoured related to Lucrezia Borgia,
at present living in Brighton, and sending out
an occasional package out in the post.

Luciano is darkly different. He is an arch assassin, and has the ability,
using the family gene for expert disguise and stealth, to turn
himself into any kind of clock or timepiece at will, or anyone. This has influenced
our whole culture with phrases whose derivation eluded us, until now.

Watch out.

Stems from Lucianos many shootings whilst leaping
unannounced from an opened watch with a shotgun.

Hes carrying a piece.

Previously nearly always thought to mean a firearm, but actually
meant, careful, hes got a timepiece on him.

He looks of good carriage

Assassins were well paid, and often were disguised
as carriage clocks, so were considered good suitors.

your time is up.

The final realisation that the Grandfather clock
in the hall has moved upstairs recently.

youve been clocked.

An allusion to deaths by clock. Almost all assassinations,
here outlined above incontrovertibly by photographic evidence,
were by Luciano, or someone of similar ilk, disguised as clocks.

someone is clocking you.

Your time on this earth now is limited, you are being
sized up by a fob watch or larger clock.

The Sundance Kid of wild west fame was a derivative
of sundial, and was of course Luciano, that is why there is no body.

Captain Cronos the arch killer, was of course based on
the nautical Chronometer, from when Luciano used to sail.

Where do you think the name Alarm Clock came from.

Because they originally startled people awake at assassinations
down the years, and imitations were made for the public,
to keep the true reasons from them.

Samurai clocks give death at the third stroke.

Digital clocks allude to fingers as opposed to the old hands,
both of course refer to strangulation thuggee clocks,
from Lucianos times India.

Fobbed off.

An allusion to death by fob watch. Another derivation being,
easily fobbed off, as but of course a fob watch was so small, it was
easy to make good your escape.

Bill Oddie thinks hes going to get a new series

This picture says differently.

Recently the Alien Cat caused some trouble for the Family,
interrupting Gimpos holiday, and breaking up Frankies
backing group leaving him and Robodog alone.

that is how he met his end from Luciano.

Yes, time ran out for the Alien Cat.

King Kong did not climb the Empire State Building on a whim.
No, as can be clearly seen below, someone had wheeled in
a grandfather clock, and his instincts warned him to climb.

Guy Fawkes was not apprehended by Beefeaters, a fable.
He was shot by Big Ben, which is in fact a giant teddy bear.

on his way in

and slain

Nice shot sir,
No question it was Big Ben that did it.

Here we see incontrovertible proof to this day.

Above, Big Ben as we know it.

And now, in a blink of the eye too fast for humans
but captured on fast film, Luciano, the huge teddy
bear that most think is Big Ben.

The higher echelons know he is there but are powerless to intervene,
point of fact Tony Blair is not afraid of Gordon Brown, not at all,
instead he is terrified of a colossal teddy bear on top
of parliament peering at him, but cannot let on.
That is where the insane grin stems from.

Luciano even changed the course of history
without shooting anyone on certain days.

Mareshal Ney was late for the battle of Waterloo.


has echoed down the centuries.

Its obvious now isnt it, his clock was wrong.

Hitler slept in on the morning of the Normandy landings
and no one was brave enough to wake him.


Yes, you know it, his alarm clock failed to go off.

Here we see Luciano quite drunk on the
proceeds of a successful shooting.

So, do not ask for whom the bell tolls,
as by now, if you did not know before,
you surely know the answer,
and whos ringing it.

Luciano and his cousin Alberto,
on holiday in the country.

Luciano on Holiday in Scotland
further evidence of suppressed link
between guns and

Vancouver Nine o Clock Gun
Three guesses who has
Canadian relatives.

The Times square clock
even has a gun hole
visible beside it.

that is why people ask you,
hey, have you got the time on you.
They want to see if you are well armed.

Must go now, I am murdered for time.

As my partner pointed out, lots of clocks
are just waiting the right time to strike.