The bear for all seasons.
that is Troll. He is grubby, he is mean.
He has a bad habit of eating people. And
burping. He is unkempt and unruly.
He rarely bathes and has strange hair.
Troll does not appear on Family photos.
Troll is Luigis ultimate weapon.
He looks friendly enough, but beware.
This gives you a bit more of an idea of
his actual size. Troll is no ordinary
bear. He lives in the Lickey Hills in
the Midlands and has been mistaken
for puny Pumas and Brown bears
whilst out eating sheep and cows.
Sometimes he blends in, almost invisible at his local,
and downs thirty or forty pints and eight pork pies,
without anyone noticing he is even there, but mainly
he sticks to the woods and glades eating passers by.
Most of the time he is out and about where the weather
is fine. Here we see him resting after suddenly meeting a couple
of slightly overweight joggers. He introduced them to a
new type of diet.
Occasionally Luigi needs him for an undercover mission, and he very
cleverly disguises himself. Here we see him disguised as
bat, for a nocturnal job.
And here, the transmutation is complete, troll as vampire bat.
As you can see, he would not make too good a house pet, and is not
your cuddly everyday bear. He has attitude, and is big.
So next time you are out walking, watch out, Troll may
be about, and he might just see you first.